Saturday, December 17, 2011

lucky problems

Wednesday morning = doctor's appointment & I was like: whaaaat?
Wednesday afternoon = spent with Ryan on a boat & I was like: I'm so lucky.
I went to a new doctor this week to address some not fun symptoms I've been experiencing. I didn't think anything would really be wrong or anything, just thought I'd get some medicine and get out of there. I ended up getting a little bit lost on the way to his office and then encountering a really terrible accident in Kyle and then arriving 15 minutes late; I'm never late. Anyways, the doctor was amazing and brilliant and I loved him except for the problems he said he was concerned about regarding my situation (the internet is no place to get specific, y'all know that). Like, I'm just an everyday 20 year old college student going about her business and not getting into any trouble; nothing could be wrong with me... but after hearing about what he thinks I am suffering from, I started to take everything in and realize it wasn't something I'd heard about happening to someone else. He proceeded on to tell me how he would address the problem and the words "surgery" and "anesthesia" were casually thrown around.

I was thinking about the doctor visit later on that afternoon. After venting and confiding in a close friend about everything going on, I realized that my main concern at this point was just the potential pain of the surgery and just the thought of surgery. At no point during the day was I concerned, worried, or stressed about the cost. That's when I realized how lucky I am.

To be sick and have to worry not only about getting better and surviving, but having to worry about whether getting your medication will mean not feeding your children... that is what some people face. The next day when I went to pick up my prescription, the girl at Walgreens said, "That'll be two-ninety-two." I said, "oh my God, like two hundred and ninety two dollars...?" and she laughed at me. Praise the Lord... it was $2.92. The thing I realized, though, is that $2.92 is to some people what $292.00 is to me.

OH, some good news I want to throw in really quickly because good news is so rare this week- I was officially accepted into the School of Social Work this week.

This past semester, one of my social work classes focused in a lot on poverty and welfare. I had no idea what it meant to live on minimum wage. Some of the documentaries we were shown... just wow. This poor woman whose husband left her with her 3 dependent children. She had been working as a waitress for years. She was getting fewer and fewer hours due to a change in restaurant management. She could no longer afford her car. Her car was taken away. She had no way of getting to work. Her middle daughter was lashing out from the trauma of the divorce and became violent, needed therapy.With no car while living in the country in a home she couldn't afford or sell, going to work was nearly impossible. After divorce, men are financially far better off than women. At one point, her daughter offered her the $15 she had saved in her piggy bank. I don't remember how this woman's particular story ended, I just remember the scenes of her crying at the end of days where she had literally done everything she could... but it wasn't enough.

I'm going to be a social worker and I'm going to help people. No one should suffer like that. More on my social work aspirations another day.

I'm pretty lucky this week with all the problems that life has thrown at me: my weird diagnoses... at least I am insured and can go to a great doctor! my flat tire problem... at least I have an amazing boyfriend who was with me when it happened, and at least I am so incredibly and undeservingly fortunate to have a dependable vehicle (this is the first problem I've had with my little buggy)! I was almost positive my computer was completely broken today and I was so mad... but at least I have a computer to begin with and have access to computers at my university if something should happen to mine and I cannot replace it!

It's a week of "at least"s and I'm trying to stay on top of everything... but it's hard. Thank God for Ryan, my continually forgiving & tolerant parents, and my NRL Academy sisters who support me at all times.


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